


Don't Soil the Satin, Please

by TigerCat111



Category: Five Nights at Freddy's
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medieval, Comedy, Drama, F/M, Funtime Foxy wears a dress for the majority of the fic ngl, M/M, Romance, Yenndo is done with everybody's shit, flustered Funtime Freddy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:21:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27638135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TigerCat111/pseuds/TigerCat111
Summary: When Freddy was chosen to carry out the most important mission of the Revolution yet, he trained like he never had before. He honed all his skills, preparing to put everything he had into this mission.The mission?Capture the Princess. Swipe her when she went on the balcony at exactly 2:30pm.What he wasn't expecting to find was a flirtatious Prince contently awaiting his captivity...in a dress.(Medieval-Type Revolution AU)
Relationships: Funtime Foxy/Funtime Freddy (Five Nights at Freddy's), Lolbit/Ennard
Comments: 7
Kudos: 20





	1. Mission Gone Wrong

_*Thoughts*_

"Speech"

* * *

* * *

_"Remember, Freddy. This is the most important mission we've had so far. If we succeed, we have a chance of ending this war and achieving the success we've worked so hard for."_

_General Yenndo stared down the younger bear, his grey, battle-scarred face extremely serious._

_The white and purple bear nodded, his sky blue eyes reflecting his mentor's resolve._

_This was what he was born for, the mission he was meant to do; having been born at the start of the Revolution 19 years ago, he was brought up and trained to be a rebellion warrior by the General himself._

_"The Princess goes out on her balcony at exactly 2:30." Freddy snapped back to attention as his elder continued. "You and the men will scale the wall of the castle while my troop gives a distraction on the other side to keep the King's attention. Keep her quiet and take her away as quickly as you can."_

_"Threaten her if needed, but try not to harm her too much," The soldier quoted back._

_A nod from Yenndo._

_"We aren't trying to kill her. We're keeping her as leverage. She's a very valuable asset, you know."_

_"I do."_

_Yenndo stared in his eyes for a moment, then turned away._

_"I know your anger can get the best of you, Freddy, but make sure you can keep your composure as best as you can. Your part of the mission will require great finesse, and depending on how long my diversion will last determines how much time you have to work with. If something, **anything** goes wrong, you'll need to keep a clear head and find a way out."_

_"I know. I'll do my best."_

_A nod from his superior._

_"Good. Go rest. Morning will be here sooner than you think."_

* * *

Yenndo was certainly right about _that; s_ eemingly just as Freddy had closed his eyes, he was being awoken by the trumpet call and getting ready for his mission.

This was not received well by the bear, as he had been tossing and turning for most of the night, worried about how the following day would turn out; once he did get to sleep, he dreamt of seemingly every possible _wrong_ outcome.

As he ate breakfast in the mess hall, he spied Yenndo speaking to another General; a tall white rabbit, also bearing many battle scars.

He caught them both glancing at him from time to time; he wasn't surprised, really. He knew some of the other Generals weren't sure if he was ready for such an important mission.

_*I don't blame them...I'm only 19. I'm still not sure why he picked me for this.*_

He snapped to attention when Yenndo made his way over.

"At ease," The older bear assured. "I'm simply checking in."

Freddy gave a nod.

"All is well, General. Everything is in order."

"Good. We leave in an hour."

As he walked past, he gave the younger a reassuring pat on the shoulder.

" _You'll do fine._ " He whispered.

Freddy couldn't help but feel he was talking to himself moreso than the soldier going to kidnap the Princess.

* * *

Yenndo sighed upon returning to his quarters, thinking of what was to come in the next hour.

_*Please, Lord, let the boy be successful. I can't imagine what would happen to either of us if he isn't...*_

He cared for Freddy, as if the boy were his own son, but he knew that trouble seemed to follow the bear; unfortunately, being a soldier in a revolution was a bad place for that problem to exist.

_*Why do I feel like something is going to happen...?*_

He sighed.

_*The wise old woman...I should pay her a visit soon...*_

The Wise Woman was a close friend of his anyways, but he knew that her oracles were very important, especially at a time like this.

_*Besides, if this goes wrong and I get fired, I might need a place to stay...*_

* * *

The march was long and tedious; the rebels' base was practically on the other side of the country, after all.

Eventually, the moment Freddy had been _~~absolutely dreading~~_ awaiting arrived.

The castle came into view.

Taking the outskirts took even longer, but the necessary evil was soon over when Freddy's small troop arrived at their side of the castle.

The sounds of nearby warfare had already begun filling the air, signaling that Yenndo's half of the plan was active.

Freddy looked up at the sun.

_*Perfect timing.*_

He inhaled deeply.

_*Here goes nothing...*_

He gave the signal for them to begin.

Soon the wall was covered in ropes leading up; luckily they had gone up the mountainside, so they didn't have an insanely dangerous climb.

Not to say it wasn't difficult, however.

Sweating and breathing hard, Freddy and five other unimportant side characters climbed atop the balcony.

The bear unsheathed his sword...

"Took you lot long enough. Honestly, I put on a nice dress, have the finest heels made perfect in my size, yet you all feel the intense need to _tease_ me? I never!"

That was _certainly not_ a female voice.

The soldiers' heads snapped up to find a white and pink fox sitting at a small, elegant roundtable, legs crossed, facing them; he took a sip from a shiny pink teacup.

...While wearing a long, shiny red dress.

Lowering his cup, he smirked delicately, sweetly batting his eyelashes.

"Though I suppose it gave me time to finish my tea, so perhaps I can let it go."

* * *

Prince Foxy eyed the rebels before him.

_*Stout, tough fellows...just as I suspected...*_

When his eyes landed on the supposed leader, he couldn't help but stare a little; his helmet was open, revealing two sky blue eyes he seemed to get lost in.

_*But you, sir, are a welcome surprise.*_

His surprise of being present instead of his sister did not seem so welcome, unfortunately; but to him, their confusion certainly was.

He could see the panic set in in the bear's _*absolutely gorgeous*_ eyes.

"You all seem a bit frazzled," The prince mused, sipping away the remainder of his tea. "Is something _wrong?_ "

He couldn't help another smirk as some annoyance passed through the bear's eyes.

For a moment, he wondered if the rebels would either leave or get caught from just standing around; however, that curiosity was cut off when the bear's sword ended up pointed at his throat, forcing him to tear his eyes away from the suddenly angry bear and to the shiny blade.

"Where," The bear growled, "is Princess Lolbit?''

* * *

Freddy was trying _so hard_ not to scream.

The mission had been going _so well,_ they had been _so close,_ and then **_this guy_** shows up and fucks with it all!

In a _dress!!_

Their mission was being compromised by some weirdo in a dress!!

Freddy's anger issues decided to kick in at that moment, prompting him to shove his sword to the fox's throat.

"Where," He growled, "is Princess Lolbit?"

While taken aback by the sudden change, the fox maintained his composure, keeping his eyes on the blade.

"My sister is--as they may put it--incapacitated at the moment, so I thought you all wouldn't mind if I came to greet you instead."

 _*Wait... **sister?**_ *

Oh.

This was _that_ weirdo.

Freddy inhaled deeply.

_*This is fine. This is fine. It's not like the mission is **completely compromised** or anything.*_

One of the soldiers spoke up.

"Sir, it seems that the diversion is retreating."

_*Shit. Yenndo's out of time. Then so are we...*_

He looked at the fox, who was still staring at the blade pointed at his throat.

The bear slowly lowered it, pondering; the other mammal raised his head to look at him again, curious.

_*So either we all get caught...break into the castle and attempt to capture the Princess... **or...***_

He bit his lower lip.

_*...Yenndo's going to kill me for this...*_

* * *

Generals Yenndo, Rabbit White, B. Red, and many of the other soldiers that didn't go on the mission were gathered in the meeting hall, staring.

Freddy was, again, trying so hard not to start screaming as all eyes switched between his troop and their prisoner.

Yenndo, eyes wide and a little twitchy, began to speak slowly.

"Lieutenant."

"Sir."

What the other members of the room didn't know was that there was a form of silent, under-the-radar communication going on behind the two bears' words; they had developed it over the years due to their family-like relationship.

It went something like this:

_" **Freddy.** "_

_"I am so sorry about this."_

The general cleared his throat.

"Are you... _aware..._ that... _that_...is not the Princess?" 

_"That's not a **woman,** Freddy--"_

The younger silently gulped.

"I am, sir."

_"Unfortunately, **I know--** "_

"And are aware that...it's a man...wearing a dress?"

_"Where the hell did you all **go?!** Where did you get **him** from?! He looks ridiculous!!"_

Being _explicitly_ reminded of the humming fox next to him made the bear have to supress an annoyed growl.

"I am aware, sir--"

_"Don't remind me--"_

He heard the fox giggle.

"He thinks I'm a man? I'm flattered."

Freddy supressed another growl.

_*I think I might hate this guy.*_

"You were supposed to capture the princess."

_"We are **so** fired."_

"There was an...error, sir."

_"I know--wait, can they fire us? We're in the middle of a war--"_

General White placed a hand on Yenndo's shoulder, ending the interrogation; the battle-hardened rabbit stared at the fox.

"Lieutenant," He began, "explain what happened on the mission."

Resisting the urge to glare at the royal mutt next to him, Freddy began recounting all that happened--leaving out minor details such as the chaotic bathroom breaks they'd had to take in the woods, of course.

When he finished, the Generals were more than a little perturbed that the male would willingly put on a dress and _heels_ \--but more pressing was the fact that he seemed to _know_ about their plan to capture the Princess beforehand.

The three stepped away for a moment to discuss something; the other rebels all began silently eyeing the captive.

The prince glanced around at them all; he began picking at the lock on the handcuffs binding his hands behind is back.

Boredom nudged it's way into the back of his mind as the Generals took their sweet time discussing; he caught the glances they threw his way, but soon lost interest in what they were saying.

He turned his head to the Lieutenant next to him, who he could now see was definitely a bear due to him taking his helmet off in the presence of the Generals; his blue eyes went well with his white and purple fur, in Foxy's opinion.

When the bear caught his gaze, he gave him a playful smirk, which was met with a flustered turn of the head.

_*Aww, he flusters easily, like a child. At least **something** can entertain me while I'm here.*_

He looked around the room.

_*Rebels or not, they could really use an interior decorator. This place is so drab. I'm surprised they're still sane enough to continue the war with how much brown is in this place.*_

His attention was drawn back to the Generals, who were approaching again.

His ears perked when the rabbit addressed him.

"Are you truly the Prince?"

Foxy couldn't help a snicker at the question.

"Of course I am. I can prove it, if you'd like."

Before they could answer, he began listing off valuable information.

"My father is planning to bomb your other base in the next few days, my mother made the executive decision to cut off trade with one of our neighboring kingdoms to prevent you all from getting valuable supplies under their noses, my sister convinced her boyfriend to help her prank the priests at the temple last year, I caught the gardener, one of our cooks, and one of my sister's ladies-in-waiting having an affair together last month and they've been sneaking me extra food that I'm not supposed to have to keep me quiet, I'm 95% sure that my father sings in the shower even though everyone else thinks it's my mother because he has a terribly high-pitched singing voice--"

"THAT'S ENOUGH!!" General Red snapped, as many of the other soldiers were barely containing their laughter and those who'd taken the initiative to write what he'd said down were nearly breaking their pencils with how fast they were writing. And the fact that he just couldn't take any more.

"I have more when you're ready," He chirped.

"We'll...have you tell us more later," General White replied a little uneasy.

"As of right now," Yenndo continued, "Since you are _definitely_ the Prince, we're going to proceed as planned with the Princess but with you instead. With some... _different_ measures, of course..especially since you don't seem too concerned with giving out valuable information."

"I have my reasons." The fox shrugged.

"...Right..."

"Lieutenant," General Red addressed Freddy, "while ya failed t' capture the Princess, ya still managed t' bring us a royal; _however,_ proper measures still have t' be taken. And since the puppy likes ya so much, ya get t' be his _personal guard._ "

Freddy's eyes went wide as saucers while a strange grin spread across Foxy's face.

"P-Pardon, sir?"

"He'll need to be surveyed 24/7," General White replied. "You seem to be the most... _qualified_ for that."

Freddy barely stuttered out a "Yes sir" to them while the other soldiers were relieved it wasn't them.

* * *

As the other guards and Freddy led the Prince to his cell, the other Generals addressed Yenndo.

"I dunno if that boy o' yours is a genius or an idiot, Yen." Red snorted.

"Let's hope the Commander doesn't freak out over this," White muttered.

Yenndo gulped, deigning to visit the wise woman soon.

Besides, that gut feeling was still there.

* * *

Foxy was practically skipping next to Freddy, which was giving the bear odd vibes.

Even worse was when the fox linked both of his arms around the bear's right, humming.

"Isn't this great, Lieutenant? You and I get to spend the next who-knows-how-long together!"

Feeling a tad nauseous at the thought, he attempted to pull his arm away, but to no avail.

He paused.

"Wait, how and _when_ did you get out of your cuffs--"

"Pfft, those old things? That was one of the most simple locks I've ever picked. My hands have been free for about twenty minutes now!"

With no superiors around, Freddy let out a sigh.

This was going to be a _long_ revolution.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, new story is up and running!!
> 
> So this is a little something I've been working on for the past month or so; it was originally supposed to just be a long one-shot, but more ideas pooled in my brain and it became a full-fledged story. 
> 
> It won't be nearly as long as something like Night Life will be; I'm estimating around 30 chappies on this one. Hopefully this will be just as enjoyable!
> 
> If you didn't pick up on it, the 3 Generals here are Yenndo, a White Rabbit (Fnaf World Character), and a RedBear (Fnaf World Character). More characters will be introduced as the story progresses.
> 
> Well then, See Ya Next Chappie!!


	2. A Very Annoying Prisoner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Freddy has to get used to his new "friend", who just can't seem to sit still. And who also likes to compare them to Shakespeare's favorite idiot couple.

_*Thoughts*_

"Speech"

* * *

* * *

Freddy was not in the greatest of moods.

It was his second day watching the Prince, who couldn't seem to sit still or keep quiet for more than five minutes at a time; he tended to wander around his small cell, attempt to talk to Freddy, scratch at the wall, complain about how boring their architectural designs were, scratch himself, poke at Freddy, chew on something, need to use the bathroom, stare at Freddy, knock on the walls, talk to _himself--_ it just never seemed to _end!_

Freddy's breaks were only for meals and sleep, and he hadn't gotten enough of either the day before; thus, he was extra cranky today. (The one upside to this accursed job was that he didn't have to wear his helmet constantly.)

_*I want to slap him.*_

Prince Foxy was currently scratching at the wall, humming some tune Freddy didn't know.

He happened to turn his head right as the bear looked at him, making them lock eyes.

He gave him a playful smirk, batting his eyelashes.

"Like what you see?"

Red bursting onto the bear's face, he quickly turned away, growling.

"Not particularly."

"Oh, don't be like that," He purred, sauntering over, that stupid red dress swaying as he did so. "If we're going to be together from now on, we have to get along!"

"We really don't," Freddy deadpanned, facing away from the insufferable male.

"Of _course_ we do. If we don't, I'll be bored and you'll keep being cold and distant. We can't have that, now can we?"

"We _should_ have that, actually," The bear growled. "You're a prisoner of war and I'm the one stuck guarding you. We're from opposing sides. Technically, we shouldn't even be _talking._ "

"Ugh, _technicalities._ So _boring._ " Foxy stuck his arms through the squares between the horizontal and vertical bars, leaning on the steel door. "Romeo and Juliet ignored _their_ technicalities."

"They both _died._ I don't think that story's even supposed to be a romance."

"Please, Romeo was _absolutely_ gay with his servant until Juliet came along. What a homewrecker."

Freddy couldn't help but turn around and stare at him.

"What?"

The bear silently stared, then turned back around.

"I think you're insane."

"Aww, thank you. That's nice than anything my father ever said to me."

Freddy placed a hand on his face and groaned.

"Tired, Love?"

"Never call me that ever again."

"Alright then."

A moment of silence passed.

"If we were Romeo and Juliet, I think I would be Juliet," The fox mused. "I _am_ wearing the dress, after all."

Freddy facepalmed.

"We are _not_ Romeo and Juliet, and we are _not_ discussing this."

"But we are!! We're from opposing sides--you said it yourself--, my father would kill me if he caught us together, I have a female servant, you probably have a quirky male sidekick, and we have chemistry. It all adds up."

Freddy resisted the urge to slam his head into the wall.

"We do _not_ have chemistry. We are _not_ Romeo and Juliet. And for the record, we could probably play it off if your father caught us together."

"Ooh, scandalous~you rascal!!"

Another groan.

_*Damnit, I walked right into that one.*_

"Oh, don't be like that. It's cute you would probably lie directly to the King's face for me."

"On second thought, I think I'll push you down a well," Freddy mumbled.

Foxy's ears perked.

"Now that's not very nice. We haven't even planned where our graves should be placed."

"What?!"

"We _are_ Romeo and Juliet, after all."

"We are _not!!_ "

"Well, not yet, anyways. We aren't star-crossed lovers yet. Speaking of which, who should act first? I always wanted someone to sweep me off my feet--"

" _Neither of us will be sweeping the other off his feet!!_ " Freddy snapped. "Unless it's _me_ going to throw _you_ down a _well_!!"

Foxy retracted a hand, tapping his chin.

"...Well, I don't get much affection, so I suppose I'll take what I can get."

The bear turned around to stare once more.

"What?"

"Okay, I get it, you're insane. But really, _why_ are you like this? And _why_ must you be terrorizing me?!"

"I'm bored, and this is fun." The fox reached out and poked Freddy's nose. "Also, you're cute, and you fluster easily. Quite the entertainment."

The bear immediately smacked his hand away and whirled around, pinching the bridge of his nose.

_*Correction: I **really** want to slap this guy.*_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'm enjoying writing Funtime Foxy a little too much...XD
> 
> So! A little taste of what Freddy will be dealing with on a day to day basis. This won't be the only plot point in the story, but it will play a big part. 
> 
> Up next: Foxy gets taken in for questioning by the Generals. Chaos and existential crisis ensue.
> 
> Also: I made a Discord Server for my followers!! Join for exclusive content, such as announcements, theorizing, Q&A's, and sneak peaks!! And lots of memes!!
> 
> https://discord.gg/2nxuGnWE9m
> 
> That's all for now!!
> 
> See ya next Chappie!!


End file.
